Sisters

With everything that's been going on with me, good and bad, there's something that's been changing for me in a wonderful way and I wanted to share that with everyone. My sister and I for years have hardly spoken to each other, always being busy with our own lives, not avoiding each other necessarily, just too busy for each other. There's nearly four years age difference between us with me as the older sister. When we were kids there was always a huge canyon of difference between us due to that age gap. Now, as adults, it doesn't really make any difference at all anymore. We're both happily married and are moms now. There's more common ground between us, although our biggest area of common ground will always be simply that we are sisters. We look different, we have different personalities and very different temperaments, but we will always be sisters.

Over the past year, I've had some very rough times and went through some really difficult things personally, mentally, and physically. It's been the worst year for me by far and it's not getting any better with everything going on with my daughter's surgery and such. However, I wouldn't trade this year for anything because the bad things I've dealt with have brought my sister and I together like we've never been before.

Before, if something happened, I'd call my mom and figure she'd eventually pass the news onto my sister. Now, if anything happens, my husband is the first to know, my sister is second, and then my mom. Although sometimes I will call my mom first just because I expect to be on the phone with my sister longer. We instant message each other online almost every day or at least every couple of days at the most. We keep in close contact and if we can't chat through instant message, we check in through email with each other.

My sister, Jen, has been the biggest supporter of mine through my writing and has helped me over come my own feelings of incompetence as a writer. She's followed along with my writing, reading each night that I get anything done and we're chatting online and offers immediate feedback (and picks up typos I make). She is the reason I push myself to keep working on writing even when I'm feeling down on myself. She believes in me and makes me believe in myself when I wouldn't otherwise. (I did more writing today that I'll have to share with her too.)

Jen has become my best friend (aside from Angie) and my closest confidant. She's become the person I can turn to when I want to cry or complain or just vent about anything. She's become all the things I thought sisters were supposed to be but we never shared before.

This blog post has been brought on by listening to a song my sister sent me called "Sticking With You" by Addison Road (you can find it on playlist.com). Jen said always makes her think of me, especially with what I was going through earlier this year being diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and a couple of other psychiatric disorders and being hospitalized. She's right, the song makes me think of her too and often makes me cry when I hear it because I miss the years we should have spent being this close, but I'm thankful we have each other now.

Instead of an excerpt today, I'm leaving you with the lyrics to that song and hope that any of you with siblings will think of them and let them know how much they mean to you. My sister is the only sibling I have and I don't tell her often enough how much she means to me. So, Jen, if I haven't told you lately, I love you and you mean the world to me.

"Sticking With You" by Addison Road

Come on, it's me you're talking to
there's something going on inside of you
don't have to say it, but I wish you would
cause it would be much easier

You always hide behind yourself
you walk a lonely road with no one's help
I hate to break the news
you're headed for a fall

And if I have to jump
then I'll jump
and I won't look down
you can cry, you can fight, we can scream and shout
I'll push and pull
until your walls come down
and you understand I'm gonna be around
I'm sticking with you
I'm sticking with you

Even if you try and shut me out
I'm staying here 'cause thats what love's about
I might let you down, but I won't let you go

So lean into me, I want to know
Everything about the fear you hold inside
'cause you and I are better than just one so

If I have to jump
then I'll jump
and I wont look down
you can cry, you can fight, we can scream and shout
I'll push and pull
until your walls come down
and you understand I'm gonna be around
I'm sticking with...

If that's what it means to love you
If that's what it means to have your back
If that what it takes to show you
Then I'm in, I'm in

If I have to jump
then I'll jump
and I wont look down
you can cry, you can fight, we can scream and shout
I'll push and pull
until your walls come down
and you understand I'm gonna be around

And if I have to jump
then I'll jump
and I wont look down
you can cry, you can fight, we can scream and shout
I'll push and pull
until your walls come down
and you understand I'm gonna be around
I'm sticking with you
I'm sticking with you
I'm sticking with you